Tuesday, May 11, 2010

If Mama Ruled The World


I wish I could claim responsibility for this post, but I can't. This was The Local Crank's post for Mother's Day. I thought it was very funny, and there's more than a little truth in it. The world would probably be a lot better off if mother's like this actually did rule the world. Here is his post:


IF MY MAMA RULED THE WORLD

  • There would, in fact, be no war because we are ALL family and we are GOING to learn how to get along or she will know the reason why;
  • If war did break out, it would end quickly. Probably with a fly swatter or possibly a wooden spoon. At the very least, the offending nations would be restricted to their bedrooms until they had an opportunity to think about what they had done;
  • No one, particularly grandchildren, would ever go hungry. Moreover, they would get good food, not that junk they serve nowadays. And if they behaved themselves, they would get home-made ice cream or fry-bread with cinnamon and powdered sugar. And they’d probably be allowed to put the powdered sugar on themselves;
  • The world would learn to love squash, cornbread, fried okra, three-layer salad, sweet tea, and (at Christmastime) kanutche;
  • The environment would be cleaned up and it had best stay that way, because all you nations are old enough now to clean up your own messes and not make her have to come along and pick up after you. United States, China, I’m looking at you!
  • The strong would never be permitted to bully the weak. Ever;
  • Everyone would respect their elders. Or else;
  • There would be universal day-care, particularly for grandchildren;
  • Not only would there be universal healthcare, but everyone would visit the dentist and the eye doctor at least once a year;
  • Everyone would be encouraged to go as far and as high as their wits and talents could take them, everyone would get a good education if they just buckled down and tried hard and everyone would be allowed to make their own mistakes, but there would always be someone there to help them out when they did.
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