A Satire On The "War On Women"

It's no secret that the right-wing congressional Republicans (and the GOP presidential candidates) have virtually declared war on the women of America. Commenting on the latest Republican attack on women, their opposition to the Violence Against Women Act, Senator Dianne Feinstein (D-California) says, "This is part of a larger effort, candidly, to cut back on rights and services to women. We've seen it go from discussions on Roe vs. Wade, to partial birth abortion, to contraception, to preventive services for women. This seems to be one more thing."

She is absolutely right. Republicans seem determined to cut both rights and services for American women. They have, in essence, declared war on women -- and seem determined to put and keep women in a second-class citizenship status. Here in Texas, Republican legislators have mandated that women seeking a legal abortion must be raped by a vaginal probe and humiliated before exercising their constitutional right (which if performed by an individual would result in a well-deserved and lengthy prison sentence).

My fellow Texas blogger, John C. over at Bay Area Houston (an excellent resource on Texas politics), has written a great post. It is a very funny tongue-in-cheek satire on the Texas vaginal rape law (and the general war on women). I am reposting it here for your benefit:

Governor calls for new prostate exam procedures.

"Every life lost to prostate disease is a tragedy we all must work together to prevent, and I commend Rep. Miller and Sen. Patrick for their hard work on this significant legislation,"

Friday March 16, 2012  •  Austin, Texas  •  Press Release

Gov. Rick Perry ceremonially announce his support for new legislation crafted by Senator Dan Patrick and Representative Sid Miller which requires men to have a modified prostate procedure to ensure he is fully informed before making any impactful decisions.

The governor designated the measure an emergency item for the upcoming 2013 Legislative Session. He was joined by Sen. Dan Patrick and Rep. Sid Miller at the ceremony. "This important bill will ensure that every Texas man seeking or not seeking a prostate exam has all the facts about the procedure, and understands the devastating impact of such a life-changing decision."

The bill will require a series of hour long anal probes, performed by specialists with overly large digits, which will provide much needed information for men to determine what medical procedures would be necessary in the future. Under this legislation, a physician is required to display the results of the probe and explain the results in graphic detail.

"This bill will protect human life: the lives of men who may or may not want a prostate exam, as well as those who are faced with such a life changing decision," said Rep Sid Miller. "By providing men with a full 24-hour waiting period between these long, detailed, penetrating, pulsating, anal probes, this bill will provide men with adequate time to catch their breath and weight the impacts of their life-changing decision of taking a desk job without the use of Preparation H."

"Today is a great day for men's health in Texas," Sen. Patrick said. "This bill will greatly improve men's healthcare in Texas, provide men the information that they deserve through informed consent of a pulsating, probing, and long duration anal probe, and will undoubtedly save thousands of lives."

After the ceremony Dr. Miller joined Dr. Patrick in performing a medical procedure to remove Perry's head from his ass.


NOTE: State Senator Dan Patrick and State Representative Sid Miller are the Republicans who wrote and pushed through the Texas vaginal rape law. They would, of course, never actually write a law like the one above -- because that would subject them to the same kind of rape and humiliation they have so happily forced upon Texas women.